Unstoppable Fist Review

The world has had more than its fair share of saviors - from battle-hardened future soldiers to unassuming short guys with really hairy feet – but nothing compares to the power of a mullet. Especially not a mullet from space.

Unstoppable Fist is certainly wacky and weird, what with the very large “business in front, pleasure in the back” gentleman punching oversized insects and flying turtles into goo, but the underlying game is actually very straight-forward. Enemies approach the stationary street fighter from one of six different zones (right high, left low, etc) and players have to tap the corresponding areas with the proper timing in order to splatter their would-be attackers. Tapping two opposing zones (i.e. left mid and right mid) will perform simultaneous attacks in both directions, while swiping up or down performs a vertical attack that will hit anything on a given side no matter the height. Of course not all enemies can be dispatched with a single blow, and some utilize more complex attack patterns than “move forward,” so timing and reflexes are everything.

The absurdity will no doubt be enough to get people buying Unstoppable Fist, but it’s more than just a beautifully bizarre homage to retro games and trailer parks. If someone set this game up in an arcade, assuming an arcade still exists somewhere in the universe (a moment of silence, please), it would undoubtedly be a quarter-muncher. The act of hitting an object that’s careening towards the center of the screen isn’t complex in any way, but it can be fun. Quite a bit of fun, actually. And the option to choose from three different difficulties makes it possible for players with a fairly wide range of skill levels to partake.

I could go on about how the simplicity might be considered a negative to some people, but I honestly can’t imagine how anyone would be able to expect something deep or complex from Unstoppable Fist. It wears its simple and addictive qualities on its proverbial sleeve. Or rather, its pink shirt cuffs. Really the only legitimate complaint I have is that this game gets hard. It gets hard incredibly fast, and can become a chaotic mess of flying teeth and claws just as quickly. Granted there are several difficulties to help curb the issue, but each choice seems to be a bit tougher than one would initially expect, regardless of whether it’s supposed to be easy or grueling.

No one should download Unstoppable Fist and expect to find an hours-long experience full of character upgrades or dynamic storytelling, but it doesn’t hurt to reiterate that fact. However, anyone looking for a short, sweet, fun, and almost infinitely replayable score-attack style arcade game to be played on the go can stop right here. The search is over. Time to beat some alien turtle face.